A quick, boring update

Church
I was afraid the church hunt would be lonely, daunting and scary. I imagined looking around with the newcomer "where am I" look, only to stumble around and sit alone. Maybe nobody would want to talk to me. But being the proactive I am, I wouldn't wait too long to take initiative and introduce myself. But maybe I would be too intense or awkward and the conversations would be short lived. Maybe people would be nice enough to introduce themselves, but too busy to really get to know me. And when I reached the 10 minute limit of awkwardly standing alone, I would leave without making a real connection.

But God provides and I'm surprised at what a small world it is. Over this past month, I was blessed to have Eurie welcome me in every way as I checked out Wellspring. And I was surprised and delighted to see many familiar faces at Living Word as well.

The plan is to check out three or four churches, each for a month, and then make a decision. Wellspring was my August, Living Word is my September, and SF Bible will be my October.

I want to take my time in this search. I rushed in college. I got stars in my eyes and immersed myself. It was really good, but now that I know more about Christianity I want to see how it is applied and actualized at different churches. I want a good grasp of the doctrine, the philosophy of ministry, and how the body fellowships and serves. I want to think of this as a long term decision. At the same time, not having a home church feels a little homeless and I'd rather settle sooner than later.

Work
I finished my first week of work last week. I've been working throughout this year, but this position feels like my first real job. I'm also more committed to it than I was for the other jobs. It's a small company and I have a lot of opportunity to grow and take on responsibility, which is exciting because it would be a slower, more limiting process at big companies. It's nice that there's no bureaucracy. Interesting tidbit - a lot of my coworkers are Mormon, my boss is in fact. hMm courage and discernment please.

All in all, I feel like life is steady. Last year was a pruning year and I feel like this year is smoothing out and I am ready and excited to bear fruit! I hope I bear figs, because they're my favorite. Small, and sweet, and rare (because they have a short season)

Museums and Impressionism

I don't like museums. Sure, the first artifact is exciting. But then you move on to the next, and it's nice, but it looks too familiar. After the fifth, the novelty is gone and I'm ready to go home.

On Saturday I went to the Birth of Impressionism exhibit at de Young Museum. First time using an audio tour and I have to say, it made all the difference. I'm usually too lazy to scramble to the front, only to get a half view of a small description, blocked by a tall head. But with the audio tour, the history was made accessible by the push of a few buttons. :)

I always thought impressionism was cool, but not a standout amongst other styles. This exhibit made me appreciate the thinking behind the movement. Before impressionism, the French Salon was the key holder to what was considered good art. This manifested in realism, which typically depicted mythology and archetypal beauty. Impressionists broke away from the European canon of idealized realism and painted what was truly realistic - unglamorous, mundane life. They depicted hardship, labor and war, and expressed their point of view even if it undermined their talent or meant they would earn a meager living.

They went against convention and thought for themselves! They met at cafes and talked about politics and art. Gaahhhh! I love passionate thinkers who are insightful and take time to talk about things. These days we do too much and don't think enough. We have too much TV to pass our time. I want passion and conviction to course through everything I do! But I also want those things to be tapered with the truth of the gospel. No blind passion, please.

I've slowly been learning to grow out of my idealized reality too. God has been gracious and life has come pretty easy. So I've been able to live in my lala land of dreams and fantasies. But I am ready to let go. I am ready to let them crash for glimpses of reality, because how can you be light and salt if you are ignorant to the hardships around you?

Costa Rica

I felt undeservingly spoiled last week. New car and trip to Costa Rica all paid by my mother.

Itinerary
Sunday (7.17) - Shop
Monday (7.18) - Monte Verde: butterfly tour, coffee tour and zip lining
Tuesday (7.19) - Beach tour to Conchal, Flamingo, and Tamarindo
Wednesday (7.20) - Arenal volcano: active volcano where I enjoyed the natural hot springs
Thursday (7.21) - Spa and massage
Friday (7.22) - White water rafting

I felt very rich. Not in a cool way. In an embarrassing, somewhat ashamed way. During the coffee tour the guide explained the process of producing coffee, including the picking process and how much they make. Coffee pickers comb the plants, carrying a 10 kg basket around their back. They are paid by the basket, and if a picker is fast, they can fill a basket in one hour. Wage? $1. That means on a good day, if someone works eight hours, they are paid $8 a day doing physical, back straining work. 40 hours a week, 52 weeks is $2,080 a year.

I've heard these statistics before. I've heard sermons, read Christian books telling me I'm rich and I should be thankful. But I don't know if I ever believed that in America. Certainly not in the America I saw with Berkeley students. Even the "poor" students in Berkeley are far from poor. I complain that I'm poor because I'm supporting myself and the job situation has been tough. But I have a fridge full of food, a full closet, a new car, parents who support me, etc, etc.

The service is really good in Costa Rica. I stayed at the Hilton where the employees accommodated your every whim. It made me want to stare at the floor. Don't get me wrong, I had an AMAZING time but it was a humbling experience.

Heartbreak.

New changes are here. After five years of attending EBCB, I've decided to leave. It's been a three year long process and I'm not going into details because that's not wise on a blog. All I can say is it is a heartbreaking decision, but a God fearing one.

I love this church and can rave about the blessings I've experienced in it - the equipping, service, fellowship are really EXTRAordinary. But in the end, I believe there can be gospel-centered, biblical, God glorifying churches that aren't for everyone.

I'm sad and reluctant to know relationships will change. Deathly afraid of having to make new ones because all the good ones take years to develop. But it's a good time to learn to trust and depend on the Lord. I'll try to update this blog more often to keep people in on the loop :)

To those who have been a part of this journey, thank you, thank you, thank you, and please don't be a stranger.

Hands and Ears

The bible gives us principles on how we should live our lives but it looks different in every Christian because they have unique gifts, personalities, preferences, convictions. I've been thinking about diversity lately. Not just superficial differences - like personality, appearance, hobbies, but theological, spiritual differences. Is there benefit to having spiritual diversity? In gifts, yes, in different emphasis of spiritual principles, yes. In spiritual convictions? Well it depends on what they are.

Every believer is going to have particular passages really speak to them. But part of wisdom is understanding the balance between two commandments - not going to extremes and knowing they don't conflict. One part of the bible says don't associate with unbelievers, what does darkness have to do with light? Another part of the bible illustrates that Jesus was very intimate with tax collectors and sinners. People who understand and emphasize one of these would benefit from the other because both are commanded and necessary.

Diversity in spiritual convictions is good because we have the tendency to focus on certain aspects and commandments that speak to us, that we relate to. But hearing brothers and sisters that emphasize other principles will make us more balanced Christians. One person may focus (be gifted in) equipping and serving the body. Another may focus on evangelism and mercy ministries. We ought to listen well before we tell the other our time is best spent doing ___.

God uses diversity. Maybe you're the hand and I'm the foot... Actually, I hate feet. You're the hand and I'm the ear. I don't think it's going against being like-minded if it's in the word. As long as we seek our convictions and are like-minded in the bible and the gospel.

May 12, 2010

A LOT going through my mind lately. Most of them are too personal to post on a blog and I hate being vague so I'll refrain. Instead, I'll give an update about what I've been up to :)

Fellowship - I've taken more initiative to meet with people. I was a manic in college. Five to six set meetings a week on top of other scheduled one-on-ones. But when I graduated and moved to Alameda I took a step back in this area. A lot of my close friends moved and the college people I knew were now a 20-30 minute drive away. I really am horrible at keeping in touch. My mom gives me a pout whenever I'm home, and I still don't call her that often. Plus, I'm good at complaining because "I'm always the initiator and if they want to keep in touch they should initiate." That's not what love looks like though. So tweeking that perception and taking initiative has been bueno. Fellowship is so good.

Hobbies - I want to learn how to crochet. I know a little about knitting but I never crocheted until I went down to LA a few weeks ago. A girl from Cornerstone was making headbands for a missions fundraiser. I asked her to teach me and an hour later I gave life to my first creation -



The ones Jess made were beautiful. Mine is too big and awkward as a necklace. But not bad for a first go. Still trying to figure out what I want to do with this though. It may end up in the trash :X (Other hobbies on the list: guitar, dancing, reading)

The hunt - Well it hasn't been much of a hunt because I haven't been motivated to apply. :( Looking into marketing and pr, but I really think I would like merchandising. Not 100% sure what I want to do. I just want to talk to a lot of people and honestly ask them "Hey, really, do you like your job?"

I'm taking suggestions. What do you think I should look for and go into?

Nostalgia

My Mom sold the home I grew up in yesterday. From now on I'll be in west LA rather than Glendale when I'm in so cal.

Some things I dug up in the garage -


I was really into anime. I must have drawn these when I was 15 or 16.




One part of my life is coming to an end, but I have a feeling that exciting new changes are coming up :)

Way too much to write about all I've been experiencing and learning in so cal. It's been awesome to reconnect with old friends. Encouraged at the diversity of Christianity.