Why?

The purpose in a man's heart is like deep water, but a man of understanding will draw it out." Proverbs 20:5

I always find myself going back to Proverbs because I love how straight forward, poignant and practical it is. I also love finding verses that back up my life convictions. One of them being of an introspective nature in understanding "why" I do things.

I split thinkers/introspects into two categories - "what if" people and "why" people. "What if people" are detailed thinkers who weigh options and circumstances to try to predict different scenarios and outcomes. "If I make x decision, y should happen." "Why people" are interested in understanding the heart - the purpose and motives underlying external actions.

I think it's extremely important to ask ourselves "why" because the heart is what ultimately glorifies God. Two people can look the same from the outside. They can both go to church, but it will be glorifying to God or not depending on why they do it (I want to know God vs. I want to know a hot guy/girl there).

But knowing our heart is a hard task. Our intentions are muddled, I think, because we love to think the best of ourselves. Though we have a multitude of motives for every action, we love to attribute our actions to the most virtuous motive to maintain a high esteem of ourselves. So honesty and vulnerability is important in attempting to see ourselves clearly. Constantly asking "why am I doing this" is a good check to remind ourselves of God. To give us an often needed nudge to readjust and look up.

Ok, if you know me at all I'm sure you've heard this multiple times. But I haven't blogged in a while and like I said, I love finding verses that coincide with my convictions :)

Traveling convictions

I like developing convictions. I think they're important. Too many people "go with the flow" without really knowing what they believe, without understanding why they do things. It sounds silly, but while I was traveling, I was set on developing "traveling convictions" - what's worth seeing, doing and spending time and money on.

My initial thought was - make the most out of your money - pack your day, don't sleep, see as much as you can. But, I realized I'm not a huge sightseeing person. At the end of the day a building is a building, a street is a street. It looks different, but it doesn't leave me amazed and awestruck. So if I'm not that impressed by wikitravel's "must-sees," what's worth doing?

One thing I didn't expect was to be spiritually encouraged. Pre-planning was all about agendas, excels, and wikitravelling as much information as I could. I spent a good amount of time on an 8 page word doc that listed places of interest and an excel I didn't use much. I knew what churches I would go to on Sunday, but didn't plan much beyond service. But God met me in Japan and Shanghai in ways I didn't expect.

It was a blessing to stay with Helen's parents who are missionaries in Japan. They really have a heart and burden for that country. It's not an easy place to plant seeds. It's affluent and flashy and fun. But it's spiritually dry. They really pour out more than they receive and it's hard to find mutual, strong fellowship beyond their marriage. They were so hospitable to me, a relative stranger. Their love was very practical and intentional and encouraging.

I was also blessed in Shanghai when visiting Jessica Tsai :) She's only been there a few months but has actively sought to get plugged in to a church and invest in people. She's serving, loving people, and letting people love her. Sometimes when people know they will be in a place for a short time, they decide not to invest. Their mindset is "I'm only going to be here for a short while, so I'll do what I need to get done and bounce." But really, God can do so much in any amount of time and we should be fully there wherever we are.

I left Asia with a renewed sense to invest in relationships . To love purposefully and intentionally without self-entitled reciprocation. Why should I be surprised that God would encourage and exhort me in foreign countries, even when I don't expect it? I should always be mindful of Him wherever I go and whatever I do.

Traveling convictions -

- God: See how God works in different countries

- People: Get to know people in different countries

- Food: duh

- Things will rarely go as planned. Focus on places of interest more than a set-schedule of to-do's to execute

Day 7: Shanghai Old City

Financial district (Apple Store)

Fake Market

Shanghai Old City (Yuyuan Garden)

Xingjiang Restaurant

Lounge (the Apartment)

Blue skies are rare in Shanghai. The weather was nice in both countries. Less humid than usual at that time of month because of the typhoon.

Shanghai Old City

Yuyuan Garden

Jess invited some of her friends to go to a Xingjiang restaurant known for its meat because she knows I love meat :) It was a party! Dancing and crazy costumes. Really fun!

Day 5 and 6: Shanghai

Maglev

People's Square, People's Park

South Bund Fabric Market
Xintiandi (Dumplings at Din Tai Fung)
The Bund

Dumplings and an old friend! Got to see Daisy, who I met at Berkeley when she was studying abroad 4 years ago.

The Bund :)

Day 4: Tsukiji, Ginza

Tsukiji Fish Market (Sashimi)
Ginza (Shopping, Cafe Dourtor)
Shibuya (Ramen)


On to Ginza afterwards, which is a high end shopping area. Rested at Cafe Dourtor with Helen for coffee and people watching :)

One more trip to Shibuya. Japan would not have been complete without ramen!

I stayed with the Jea's, in their home above a concrete block. It's supposed to be more stable in the case of an earthquake. Thank you so much Helen!!

Day 3 - Kamakura and Onsen

Tsurugaoka Hachimangu Shrine
Shopping at Komachi-dori street
Onsen


It was interesting seeing the shrine. The structures are beautiful, but it's sad to see people worshiping false gods. The shrine actually sounds scary because of the noises the bugs make. They were really loud...



After visiting the shrine, the Jea's took me shopping at Komachi-dori street, which is a popular tourist destination to buy souvenirs.


The souvenirs were naturally very Japanese, meaning cute and childlike. Lots of bunnies, and even a Miyazaki store.


Last activity of the day was relaxing at an onsen. It felt really good after a long day of walking. Onsens are Japanese public baths/spas. That was pretty scary as well because everyone is naked. I obviously don't have pictures of that, thank goodness!

I'm off to Shanghai tomorrow!! The Jea's were so accommodating and good to me. I was really blessed by them.

Day 2 - Shibuya, Harajuku

Self-control

I'm a big fan of being intentional and purposeful in everything we do. So when I found my mind wandering one day I googled "Desiring God self control" and came across this article - The Fierce Fruit of Self Control. It was a refreshing reminder that being sober-minded is an intentional, self-denying, painful process to seek after Christ.

"The very concept of self-control" implies a battle between a divided self. It implies that our 'self' produces desires we should not satisfy but should instead control."

"The Christian way of self-control is NOT 'just say no!' The problem is with the word 'just.' You don't just say no. You say no in a certain way: you say no by faith in the superior power and pleasure of Christ. It may be just as painful to say no. But the difference between worldly self-control and godly self-control is crucial."

The latter part really hit me because when my mind wanders, my reaction is usually "stop, you know better." But I need to remember the purpose of self-control. We don't say "no" out of duty and obligation and knowing what's right. It comes from a relationship with God and believing in His promises. I have to remind myself that indulgent, emotional reactions, although satisfying, do not lead to happiness and contentment. Striving after wisdom and sanctification does.

Lots of thoughts have been running through my mind, as usual, but I never find the time to blog, and I always feel like my writing is crap. That's all I'm going to say for now, the article articulates the concept better than I can. Read it.

In other news, I am writing from Yokohama Japan! I'll be in Japan for 4 days, then off to Shanghai for 5. My first self-paid vacation in a foreign country. I feel all grown up... Will try to post pictures :)

24

Wrote this on April 20th in that journal I always carry around. Thought I'd share since I always tell myself to blog more and there are a lot of summer birthdays.

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I love being young. I love the energy, the zeal, the freedom, the naive dreams colliding with reality. Youth is all I know. So it's a conscious effort to not feel a small sting about turning a year older. Feeling like "the best time of my life," although still in my hands, is slowly slipping through my tightly clasped fingers.

But I cling on to the reminder given on my 20th birthday - the pivotal day I moved out of my teens and started my journey into the twenties. A housemate wrote in a birthday card - don't be sad about turning older, because another year marks another year of God's faithfulness to you. A reminder to look up. In many ways life becomes less fun because we have more responsibility and are challenged to become less self-centered. Youth is "me" time. Finding yourself, doing what you want... freedom.

But as we age, I think life should get sweeter. We learn more about God, about His character, His grace, His faithfulness in our lives. And as our purpose is to glorify Him, it is sweet to grow closer to Him each year He teaches us, whether through trial or blessing.

"I Will Wait For You"

Watch it. A friend sent this to me and it pretty much blew me away. She has all the things I really like about storytellers - vulnerable, laced with biblical thinking, and great word choice. I don't like talking about relationships because I fancy myself too confident and self-assured to struggle in this area. But alas, I'm probably human and not completely immune...

Yes, her poem resonates with companionship, with looking for someone who is worthy - who reflects Christ and His Word. But, more than that, her perspective should carry into all areas of our lives. It's a reminder to stop being a control freak, trying to take every aspect of our life into our own hands. I guess the news flash is trust God because He's in control, He's sovereign, He's good, and efficient. So don't compromise, don't cheapen God's standards because in the end it will not satisfy. Even people in relationships soon figure out we were not made to be content with anything but the Lord.

Vegas

Vegas for a business conference... buffets, shop, Lion King, work :)


Partner in crime - Caroline Ang


Stayed at MGM Signature and Mandalay Bay (yay for free upgrade)


A sample of the food - You know of my attachment to meat... Del Frisco's is one of the best steakhouses in town. You know it's quality when when it's no fuss, just meat on a plate. And who can resist a sparkly red velvet? -


I always have quite a bit to say after these trips. Things I learn while I'm traveling, but I get lazy and by the time I'm ready to write I'm on another thought... maybe maybe...